The day following the super bowl I read something surprisingly relevant by espn.com’s Sports Guy:
I think God created "Grey's Anatomy" as a way to stick it to guys who watch football all day, then have to deal with girlfriends or wives who play the "Screw you, you're watching this with me, you spent all day watching football!" card on Sunday night. There's really no way out unless you're giving up any and all hope for sex later that night. This is why the ratings are so high, I'm convinced. Wait, am I sharing too much here?
Reading that I could only hang my head in shame as I remembered what I was doing right after the game, rushing home to watch “Grey’s Anatomy” at the behest of my accompaniment for the afternoon.
Later in the evening, after reading that fateful article, I shared the above snippet with her and she laughed then became serious and told me that she knows plenty of men who enjoy the show and that she didn’t think it was a “girly” show at all.
After my head stopped spinning I came to my senses and knew it was up to me to explain to her why. My first question was important, if she knew plenty (?) of men who liked the show, why watch it with me? She did notice my eyes rolling into the back of my head ever two minutes throughout the episode, right? Besides, even if she knew plenty (!) of men who watched it, and (pretend to) enjoy it, that’s all explained above in the third to last sentence of the Sports Guy’s prose.
Now it came time to think. I had laid out a framework and learned that the woman I was seeing knew plenty (?!) of men. I needed an argument and one that was creative, one that held water. She’s a law student so I couldn’t give her any opening.
Like an epiphany it came to me, a tangible way to determine if a television show, movie or any of a number of things could be considered conceived for a female audience and I’m proud of this theory enough to share. I call it “The Mangina Scale.”
It’s a simple theory really. If, on the show, none of the main male characters are cool enough to hang out with say Jack Bauer or Michael Knight. If there are a disproportionate number of male character “nice guys” who have zero chance of landing the conflicted, hard-working, intelligent female lead whom they covet. If the male characters on the show make you ashamed as a man for any number of reasons, the show has a high score on “The Mangina Scale”.
So, what is the antithesis of “Grey’s Anatomy”? What kind of show earns a solid zero on the scale? Easy, I used Jack Bauer and Michael Knight previously for a reason. 24, Knight Rider, the A-Team, Miami Vice, The Fall Guy, The Shield, MacGyver all zeros. Jack Bauer scores in the negative as a matter of fact.
Sharing my theory for the first time, she laughed a little and proceeded to jab me in the ribs then told me I was mean. Perhaps, but it sounded to me as though I had made a point. A night to savor indeed…
5 comments:
Something I've learned in my early years of marriage: make sure she shares in your TV shows as much as you do in hers. Make her watch Bloodsport, Kickboxer, Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Conan, etc., for every episode of Sex in the City or Grey's Genitals you have to watch. It's the only way to prevent a lopsided expectation from her in the long term.
Oh, and try not to sympathize with the characters... Get up and go to the bathroom IMMEDIATELY when you find yourself feeling empathy of any nature!
Good luck, dude...
One of the great things about grad school is you always have some sort of homework to do. So, after a day of watching football, I have to do my homework. While she watches "Desperate Housewives" and "Grey's Anatomy" I tune it out and do homework.
Another great solution is the 2 tv solution. Since Sunday Night there is always a game I just watch in the other room. Of course then I get the "not sharing any time" diatribe once in a while.
The cool thing about my wife is she can watch football too. Boo yah. Plus, she loves to watch soccer and snowboarding as much as I do also.
A couple characters you guys forgot to mention are Eko and Locke from Lost. Those guys are just pure badass, especially Eko. The character I identify with most though is probably Jin, since he's 1) married, 2) Asian, and 3) got a father who's a mob boss. Well, maybe not 3.
I now wish I had homework. My assorted snide comments, winces and eye rolling only led to seemingly non-stop chatter during "Battlestar Galactica". Once I brought up the ridiculous premise of her "Grey's" wherein, the dreamy lead doctor guy, whom every woman salivates over, CHEATS on every woman he's with. I asked, "is that what women want, infedelity?" Looking longingly at the screen at McDreamy (what he's referred to, and I am ashamed to know that) she defends him and BLAMES the women who've been cheated on, after all the women on the show still love the dude. Ah, the power of wussy, efeminate men. Anyway, I've said to much, way, way too much, more than I should admit to knowing. I will now attempt to erase "Grey's" from my memory.
I can be at a slight advantage here since I really don't watch much TV to begin with. Just sports mainly. Sports-wise, current gf is in to college football, olympics, and soccer. She can stomach everything else and doesn't really say "you must watch **** with me" She was kinda like that with Sex and the City in the beginning, but it toned down very much. She feels as long as I spend time with her (since work does take up majority of my day), then all is well.
I guess we just have that understanding *shrugs*
If a lady comes to a point (and this is how I ended one of my relationships) where she becomes so naggy because you wouldn't watch a show with her, that shows immaturity. Likewise for a guy if she wouldn't watch something with you. A couple cannot share EVERY interest together. It's extremely rare to see a couple that pretty much has 100% same interests.
For the most part, I've been succesfull in boycotting Grey's Anatomy on the grounds that the real point of the show is sex (and/or the lusting there for) between the various characters. The main non-mannly shows I get to watch are Opra and Dr.Phil (we got a Tivo). I make myself feel better about the shows by thinking that they at least generally try to improve society instead of degrading its moral fiber. Never fear, I often do get my RDA of debauchery from Date My Mom or some other variation of horny teens plastered on the screen.
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